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April 2, 2022 10:40 pm GMT

How I Overcame Impostor Syndrome

Everyone has felt impostor syndrome at least once in their lives. You're doing your job, often very well, but you're constantly worrying that you're not good enough, that everyone else is above and beyond you, and you'll never be as good as anyone.

When someone tells you 'Good job!', you believe that they're either lying or that you fooled them and that you're eventually gonna get caught.

The beauty of the impostor syndrome is you vacillate between extreme egomania and a complete feeling of: Im a fraud! Oh God, theyre on to me! Im a fraud! So you just try to ride the egomania when it comes and enjoy it, and then slide through the idea of fraud. Tina Fey

But why do we keep having this feeling? Dr. Valerie Young says that, The thing about impostors is they have unsustainably high standards for everything they do. The thinking here is, If I dont know everything, then I know nothing. If its not absolutely perfect, its woefully deficient. If Im not operating at the top of my game 24/7, then Im incompetent.

Studies have shown that Impostor Phenomenon is identified in up to 75% of people across multiple demographics. Dr. Clance states that Impostor Syndrome Occurs among high achievers who are unable to internalize and accept their success. They often attribute their success to luck rather than to ability and fear that others will eventually unmask them as a fraud.

Some famous people who have experienced this are Author, Maya Angelou who stated I have written eleven books, but each time I think, Uh oh, theyre going to find out now. Ive run a game on everybody and theyre going to find me out.

Do You Have Impostor Syndrome?

Here are the top 10 symptoms of impostor syndrome that were all too familiar with:

  1. Perfectionism

  2. Procrastination

  3. Constantly seeking to improve because you feel you dont know enough

  4. Negative Self Talk/ Self Sabotage

  5. Low self confidence, low self esteem, low self worth

  6. Feeling out of your depth

  7. Feeling undeserving of your success

  8. Disconnected from others

  9. Feeling alone, or like an outcast

  10. Disappointment in yourself and your abilities

How To Overcome Impostor Solution

Recognize it and reach out

The exaggerated esteem in which my lifework is held makes me very ill at ease. I feel compelled to think of myself as an involuntary swindler. - Albert Einstein

The first step is to recognise your feelings of impostor syndrome and not be silent about them. The sense of inadequacy and the idea that you are only in your role by fluke can quickly eat away and spiral into a bigger problem if you do not seek support from others. A period of uncertainty is natural as sometimes we do not always have the energy to give our role 100 per cent use this as a period of learning and take the necessary time you need to regroup.

Everyones experiences are different, so there is definitely no shame in needing help from others, but it is important to acknowledge it so you can take the right steps to move forward. Others around you can help you to differentiate between what is fact and what are just your feelings.

Remember your strengths

I still sometimes feel like a loser kid in high school and I just have to pick myself up and tell myself that Im a superstar every morning so that I can get through this day and be for my fans what they need for me to be. Lady Gaga

Many people will avoid speaking about or acknowledging their strengths out of fear of appealing boastful or overly confident. However, it is more than likely you are well-equipped to be in the role you are in. Reflecting on your career to date and the skills you have gained along the way provides a helpful reminder of exactly why you deserve to be in your position. It can also help you see where you need extra development to take the next step. Rather than this being a drawback, its an opportunity to continue your learning. Make a list of your strengths and your successes you can come back to in times of doubt.

No-one is going to be the best at everything. It is important that you do not frame your self-worth around what you cannot do, but focus on what it is that you can. Particularly as a leader, you need to recognise that others may be more skilled in certain areas, but this is ok it is important to let them shine for the benefit of the team.

Reframe your perception of failure

You think, Why would anyone want to see me again in a movie? And I dont know how to act anyway, so why am I doing this? Meryl Streep

When something doesnt go to plan, it can quickly make you question all your skills and suitability for the role, not just the event in question. By reframing your perception of failure and viewing it as an opportunity for growth, you can feel more comfortable that when things dont go as intended it is not a completely negative reflection of your skills. New ideas are not likely to go to plan straight away so be prepared to adjust and look at the situation objectively, rather than as a reflection of you personally.

More Tips

  1. Change Your Self Talk: Pay attention to how you speak to yourself. Identify your thoughts. Pay attention to what you say to yourself. Pay attention to your feelings or emotions that are coming up. Make sure your self talk is positive. Quote from Brian Tracy: You are not what you think you are, but what you think, you are.

  2. Accentuate the positive. Focus on what youve accomplished that you are pleased with. Keep a list or folder or file of positive feedback and comments. Refer to it often.

  3. Receive positive feedback. Be open to receiving positive feedback. Allow yourself to receive.

  4. Learn from your mistakes. Reframe mistakes into learning opportunities. Discover the learnings and do better next time.

  5. Define your criteria for success: Let go of being perfect nobody can relate to perfect. Its about meeting the expectations. Profit Karen, didnt think she was successful in her business, then looked at her numbers and realized she had surpassed her annual goal.

  6. Take Action Now: Do it now. Follow the 4 Ds Do it now, Diarize, Delegate or Delete the task.

  7. Seek evidence of success. Measure it, celebrate it, remember it. I am a star because.. I am successful because

  8. Reach out. Talk to a mentor and ask them to provide you with an objective external perspective of your performance.

Were almost all guaranteed to feel impostor syndrome at some point. You can stop in it its tracks. Dont let it derail you from pursuing greatness.

I believe that you have the potential inside of you to BE who you want to be, to DO what youre passionate about and to HAVE the success youre striving for. Its in you.

Be confident. Dont just wait until you feel confident to act like it. Admit when you dont know something, and be authentic and accept that you dont need to know everything. Thanks for reading, and have a great day!

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