Royal feud, Cosbys hell, Aniston trapped, and alternate universes, in this weeks dubious tabloids

There is no better proof of superstring theory positing up to 26 dimensions than this weeks tabloids, in which the headlines and the stories beneath them clearly live in entirely different universes. The British Royals fall headlong into this space-time discontinuum, led by Britains Prince Harry in the National Enquirer under the headline: "Harry Trapped in Hooker & Drug Scandal!

How exactly is Harry trapped with drugs and prostitutes? He isnt, at least not in any dimension known to humanity.His father-in-law, Thomas Markle Sr, aged 74, reportedly tells the Enquirer that in the 1970s and 80s he occasionally sampled cocaine an admission he first made months ago and that while in the Philippines, I never paid for sex. No mention of prostitutes, and no hooker scandal.

How do Markles drug admission and hooker denial trap Harry? The Enquirer claims that Markles repugnant antics could end his gorgeous daughters fairytale marriage to Prince Harry! Thats the sort of stretch you expect to see when being pulled apart at a molecular level after passing a singularity and falling into a black hole, which may well be where this weeks tabloids belong.

Royal Blood Feud Explodes! claims the Globe, with its cover headline: Royals at War! Kate & Meghans Vicious Catfight With Fergies Girls! Have the Royal women been pulling each others' hair and scratching their eyes out? Far worse, according to the Globe.

Princess Eugenie (Prince Andrews daughter by ex-wife Sarah Ferguson, for those who dont religiously follow every episode of the Royal soap opera) invited more guests to her wedding on October 12 than Meghan Markle did at the same venue supposedly an insult designed to upstage Duchess Meghan. Read the rest