Learn Japanese Quick!

There are so many ploys and scams out there that promise to teach you just enough Japanese to enjoy your big once-in-a-lifetime trip that even contemplating which one to choose is impossible.

My trips to Japan generally involve a trip to The Tokyo Disney Resort (surprise! not) and Im always scouring websites for the latest little titbit of new information. One of the few accessible ones (since most are in Japanese) is TDR Explorer. All the latest news, free, with good photography.

I like that the webmaster is actually thinking about things which would be of real practical value for a traveler not just to the Disney Resort, but often anywhere in Japan. And thus we come to his list of 17 basic phrases that you might find helpful.

The problem is that if you look at the center column of the list, you wont have any idea how to pronounce these Japanese words. They are written in what is called romaji, or the Romanization of Japanese characters into western characters. This makes them extremely simple to say if they are broken down phonetically.

For example, Yes is pronounced hi, even though the romaji spelling is hai. If you didnt know better you might say hi-ee, or ha-i or whatever.

So here is a simple tip: every syllable in Japanese is given the same emphasis. My friend Satoshis name is not pronounced Sa-TOE-shi, but Sa-t-she. Equal emphasis on all syllables.

Here, then is my own version of a list of Japanese words, all spelled out phonetically so you can pronounce them properly (or at least closely) with some ease. Note that my spellings have nothing to do with the true romaji spellings of the actual Japanese word: my only goal is so that the sounds comes out of your mouth in a way that is understood by a Japanese person and easy for you to remember. The only letter Ive noticed that is often silent is u. I should add that the following phonetic pronunciations are highly eccentric and will draw guffaws from knowledgeable folks, but they work.

Yes = hi (but dont say it slowly the way Americans do, like hiiiiii, or hi-eee); you sort of bark it out)

Hello or Good Afternoon = k-knee-chee-w

Good Morning = -h-y g-z-m-sue

Good Evening = cone-bn-w (though when you hear it said, it sounds like cm-b-w)

Thank You = dugh-m h-ree-g-t g-z-ms

Please = koo-d-s

Excuse Me (or for calling a waiter or waitress) = sue-mee-m-sn (in actual use, the u is almost silent and the first two parts combine for smee m-sn)

Sorry/Excuse me = g-mn--s

I Dont Understand = w-k-ree-m-sn

I Understand = w-k-ree-m-sh-t (said, wakarimashta)

No Thank You = kay-k-ds

Great = S-gy! (Apologies to my non-Jewish friends)

Its Cold = S-my ds

Its Hot = At-soo-ee ds (Like Chop Suey des)

Where is the toilet? -tay-h-rye d-k ds-k? (A little shout out to Buckwheat there, Otay?) Or more simply, just say toilet and act confused.

Thats Delicious = Oy-sh, ds (while eating) Yes, there is Yiddish in there.

That Was Delicious = Oysh-k-t ds (after eating) (Oysh is like Moishe without the final e)

Beer = bee-roo (rhymes with moo) (A beer please = bee-roo- koo-d-s)

Coffee = co-hee (A coffee please = co-hee koo-d-s)

And for those of you in trying to find Tokyo Disneyland, just say, Disney-lnd- and youll be in like Flint.

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