A Royal coup, Malia Obama's bribe scandal, and man-eating Angelina Jolie, in this weeks reality-challenged tabloids

When Carlos Castaneda spoke of a separate reality, he could easily have been thinking of this weeks through-the-looking-glass tabloids.

How else to explain the Globe cover story: Malia Obama Caught Up in Harvard Bribe Scandal! No, she isnt. Malia allegedly took tennis lessons from the Harvard tennis coach accused of accepting bribes for recruiting non-athletes to the university. But Malia didnt win a tennis scholarship to Harvard, or any athletic scholarship, so theres no scandal, just unjustified innuendo.

The National Enquirer is no better with its cover story about a coup within the British Royal Family, proclaiming: William Seizes Throne From Charles! Declares Own Father Unfit to Rule.

Three minor details: Charles doesnt have the throne to begin with; The monarch doesnt rule Britain any longer; and the Queen is doubtless aware of the Act of Settlement of 1701 governing the royal succession, which will make Charles the King on her demise whether she or Prince William like it or not. Even if Charles wanted to abdicate on succeeding to the crown it would require an Act of Parliament to make it legal.

The Globe sticks it to the Royals with its story: Mean Meghan to Kate: Keep Your Baby Advice! Duchess Meghan allegedly exploded angrily when Kate phoned to offer parenting advice. Because the Globe monitors all private Royal phone calls, so this must be true.Man-Eater Angie Strikes Again! reports the Globe about Angelina Jolie, referring to her sexual appetites rather than any possible cannibalism. Jolie is set to gobble up her hunky new co-star Nicholas Hoult, claims the rag, though its hard to tell if that is an oral sex reference or if she just want to jump his bones - or maybe she has turned cannibal? Read the rest