Mueller snubbed, Harry and Meghan exiled, and suicidal airline pilots in this weeks dubious tabloids

The Mueller Report is conspicuously absent from this weeks tabloids, despite landing with ample time for their deadlines. Its a measure of how far the Trump-loving propaganda rags have publicly distanced themselves from the White House that their front covers arent screaming Total Exoneration.

No doubt that has something to do with the U.S. Attorneys Office for the Southern District of New York's continuing investigation into the National Enquirer catch-and-kill policy of buying incriminating stories about Trump and suppressing them, with Enquirer publisher and Trump pal David Pecker cooperating with prosecutors. As headlines go, Total Exoneration would be about as accurate as much of this weeks fact-challenged tabloid offerings.

Royal Family Disowns Harry & Meghan Banished to Malta by Fed-up Queen, proclaims the front page of the Enquirer. Thats doubtless news to the Royal couple, who have spent the past six months renovating Frognall Cottage in Windsor, England, where they plan to move in shortly. Perhaps theyll turn it into an Airbnb rental once theyre in Malta?

Scott Peterson Death Row Pardon! declares the Globe covers report on its favorite convicted killer. Gloating killer dances with joy, the rag reports, which seems unlikely since he hasnt been granted a pardon, and is unlikely to ever receive one. The story is inspired by a wildly inaccurate reading of California Governor Gavin Newsoms newly-issued moratorium on the death penalty, which affects Scott Peterson along with 736 others on the states Death Row. And while the moratorium is morally and judicially welcome, it has little practical effect in a state where the last execution was more than 13 years ago because of repeated legal challenges. Read the rest